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25,000 Client hours as Licensed MFT -
Proven, practical strategies and tools helping thousands online since 2000 -
35 years of accumulated wisdom and resources -
First and best selling e-book, “Break Free From the Affair” -
The 10 step Matrix Method
Relief Freedom
Calm Clarity
A Radical New Framework for Loving and Being Loved
What if a simple, two-word phrase could flip an emotional switch and your life was no longer ruled and controlled by…
- The tension of helplessness or fear of being alone…
- The voice in your head, which says you’re unlovable, that something is wrong with you…
- The exhaustion of constant effort and stress to make things better?
This is possible
This is the reality for many I’ve worked with, especially in the past decade.
Ann kindly emailed me…
As I know many people will also have told you, your materials are outstanding and exceptionally well thought through. Having been in business leadership development and executive coaching for decades, I can still count on one hand the number of behavioral programs that are as well designed, researched, and intellectually coherent and integrated as yours are, not to mention being easy to use and apply. It’s always a joy to ‘meet’ someone who has invested so much in making their work/program the absolute best it can be.
Break Through Your Impasse
I’m not offering a magic wand; my wand broke 25 years ago.
This is not pixie dust. My pixie dust jar is empty.
I have developed a step-by-step process for those stuck in their painful impasse that gets results.
95% feel a tremendous sense of relief, a word I hear over and over.
Many express a sense of freedom to explore, create, and master the life and relationship they’ve always desired.
Unfortunately, the deeply felt experience of relief and freedom is temporary. The old habits, the old entrenched, toxic thinking will again sink its claws and pull you back.
A Five Second Window
But for a few seconds initially, or a few minutes later, you get a taste of and are able to experience a tension-free realm of effortless, easy, natural space.
What if you could replicate this experience again and again?
What would it be like if every time you were triggered…
- She/he does/says what they typically do to create conflict and distance…
- Your critical inner voice becomes louder and more persistent…
- Your frustration turns to overwhelm as you realize you can’t fix it.
…you could summon and use a step-by-step process to call an abrupt halt to the impasse?
Think About
It – What If…
What if this happens—and it will—over and over again?
Imagine the freedom of knowing that the old familiar patterns of hurt and pain are gone.
What would it feel like if you had control over what happens?
Imagine how exhilarating it might be to know you have these seconds, minutes of relief and freedom, to experience a natural, easy, and spontaneous love.
As you continue to use the steps, the experience of freedom, relief, and the essence of love becomes more powerful and transformative.
What would it be like if, whoever you are with or wherever you are, you can automatically call upon these steps to reshape and transform your inner experience?
My Journey
I divide my personal and professional life into two segments.
In the first segment, I had a white picket fence family and a successful private practice as a Marriage and Family Therapist, logging over 25,000 hours of direct client care.
I became an expert at helping people feel better so they left my office with their heads held high and a smile on their faces.
In midlife, I discovered my wife’s affair. My world imploded. All the cognitive and behavioral efforts helped but left me wanting more—something deeper and longer-lasting.
I wrote the e-book Break Free from the Affair as an attempt to understand what happened. Break Free from the Affair fortunately helped others as well.
Understanding was helpful, but I needed more; I needed to heal.
I spent nearly a decade creating, experimenting with, and developing a process that I used on myself first and eventually with others. This process generated profound transformation, as I shared above.
I now call the 10-step program the “Love Stacking Matrix.”
A key concept, the two word phrase, enables you to let go of your specific identified pain, fear, and hostility, and provide a space to experience a deep feeling of relief and freedom.
The “Love Stacking Matrix”
The “Love, Stacking Matrix” is an invitation to experience and project a natural, easy, and spontaneous love.
Your life and relationships are forever altered.
Love Stacking Matrix…
- Radical new framework for loving and being loved
- Accesses your inner strength and power
- Removes regrets – the shouldas, wouldas and couldas
- Erases painful past memories
- Offers compelling purpose for life and relationships
- Fills moments with peace, joy and clarity
- An anchor and compass for living and loving
- A best friend for the rest of your life
For the time being, I am offering an invitation for you to join with me in a 10 day, intensive learning, and using the Love Stacking Matrix.
Here’s what you get:
- 4 Half hour zoom sessions with me.
- Access to my “Office Hours” for questions or comments.
- FULL access to the Infidelity Recovery Center
- FULL access to the (Re)Building Courses
- Daily emails to keep you focused and on target
- Daily emails introducing you to the Love Laws.
You will:
You will create a space for love, which does not mean “being close.”
You will live by a future vision for love, rather than controlled by past painful memories.
You will experience love and project it outward.
You will learn which behaviors to change; those that have the greatest chance of influencing your relationship.
You learn how to modify/change/transform/diminish your catastrophic thinking.
You will objectively evaluate the status and make informed decisions regarding your relationship.
You will use the Love Stacking Matrix work sheet and begin stacking love experiences.
You will be aware of the key relationship killer and how to transform it.
You learn how to identify and modify your marriage mood.
You will identify with exact clarity where you get stuck and how to move through it.
You will learn how marriages and relationships really work.
You will learn how your marriage heals itself.
You learn how to feel emotionally safe with your spouse/partner.
You will create a version for love based on the three Love Laws.
You learn how to understand, in-depth, your spouse and develop acceptance, forgiveness and compassion.
Four Levels of Change/Transformation
The Love Stacking Matrix is the ultimate process for change and transformation, with the capacity to tap into your inner healing power.
To get the maximum impact from the Love Stacking Matrix, three prior levels are important to address. These levels set the stage for the Love Stacking Matrix.
Note the progressive movement of the three prior levels.
Achieve Immediate Success – Change Your Behavior and Change Your Life
- Pinpoint specific behaviors to change.
- Change the rules of your relationship.
- Get immediate (often within 48 hours) results.
Achieve Calm and Clarity – Change How you Think and Change Your Life
- Recalibrate your thinking (reframe the toxic assumptions you were taught.)
- Fill your mind with accurate information about love and marriage.
- (You know more about how your cell phone works than how relationships work.)
Break Through Emotional Barriers and Walls – Enlist a Mentor/Coach that Moves You Forward
- Become aware of hidden resources.
- Identify and overcome unconscious pulls.
- Stop living on autopilot.
Tap Into Your Inner Healing Power – Learn the 10 step Love Stacking Matrix
- Use it whenever upset/triggered.
- Begin stacking love experiences.
- Transform the stuck energy into your personal power.
A Solid Foundation and Framework
I’ve spent many years in the first segment of my life developing resources and helping people through levels one, two and three.
These important resources provide a foundation and framework for the effective implementation of the Love Stacking Matrix.
These resources are contained in the (Re)Building Membership Courses, and if infidelity dominates, your relationship, resources are offered in the Infidelity Recovery Center.
You Receive Access to the (Re)Building Membership Courses
Introduction to the Rebuilding Membership
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The four step basic communication tool. -
The key to your marriage: from fear to love -
Individual and couple progress markers -
And more…
Immediate success
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Basic principles of charging neutral. -
Charging neutral checklist. -
Carolyn’s manifesto -
And more…
Is it worth it?
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Decision points? -
Should we separate? -
Why did I marry that person? -
And more…
Counter intuitive secrets of marriage building
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10 Dangerous ideas about marriage. -
The familiar position -
Why marriages fail? -
And more…
What if my spouse won’t participate?
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Feeling safe with your spouse -
Your spouse is not your enemy -
Engaging your spouse parts one through eight -
And more…
You Receive Access to the Infidelity Recovery Center
Introduction to the infidelity recovery center
-
The four step basic communication tool. -
The key to your marriage: from fear to love -
Individual and couple progress markers -
And more…
Immediate success
-
The four step basic communication tool. -
The key to your marriage: from fear to love -
Individual and couple progress markers -
And more…
Fast results – quick relief
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Seven powerful tactics to break free. -
12 ugly unattractive tactics most use. -
How to stop the affair -
And more…
Top infidelity questions and interview
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1012 infidelity questions answered. -
The top 10 common questions people ask. -
Top 10 questions people should ask. -
And more…
Break Free from the affair E book
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Break Free from the affair E book -
My marriage made me do it -
I can’t say no. -
And more…
How to feel normal again
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Don’t shame on you. -
Why you tolerate infidelity? -
What is your infidelity IQ? -
And more…
How to influence the affair
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Stopping the affair, give them space and juice. -
How to lower the odds of repeat cheating -
Case studies -
And more…
Understanding your spouse in the affair
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The emotional affair intensive -
Getting him/her to talk -
And more…
How to develop a plan
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The type of affair dictates your strategy. -
Should I confront the other person? -
Should I spy? -
And more…
And, of course, Access to All the Courses and Lessons in the Love Stacking Matrix
How to tap into your healing power
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The evolution of the love stacking matrix. -
Nine key points to the love stacking matrix. -
16 key checklist for experiencing love stacking. -
And more…
The love stacking matrix work sheet
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The matrix worksheet -
Worksheet versions -
11 step healing process. -
And more…
Start here-what exactly to bring up
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Begin here. -
Self talk -
Reduce the tension. -
And more…
Identify thoughts and feelings
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Toxic assumptions and LSM. -
Identify thoughts and feelings. -
Cheat sheet for identifying thoughts and feelings -
And more…
Give up your goal
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Intro to giving up your goal -
Give up in the presence of love. -
The presence of love -
And more…
Please Join Me While My Schedule Permits
- 4 Half hour zoom training sessions with Dr. Huizenga
- Access to “Office Hours” for questions or comments
- FULL access to the Infidelity Recovery Center
- FULL access to the (Re)Building Courses
- Daily emails to keep you focused and on target
- Daily emails introducing you to the Love Laws
Yes, I want to take advantage of your invitation for a one time payment of $1287 or three monthly payments of $469
This is your Pivot Point
The Love Stacking Matrix often, and within five seconds, changes your world.
My professional experience as a MFT and personally experiencing the pain of a marital crisis taught me that these 5 seconds become a significant emotional experience – a highly emotional response of relief and freedom – as all of my clients state.
The 5 seconds become your baseline. You now know what healing and, in essence, a Natural Easy and Spontaneous love, is like. You move ahead, continuing to build on that freeing experience.
Your life and relationship has been on a downward spiral, probably for years, maybe for decades.
Your world became darker, occupied with fears, characterized with gargantuan effort, often just to hold it together.
In 5 Seconds you can interrupt the flow of the downward spiral.
The emotional chains of the past are broken and you are released onto a new upward journey toward a Natural, Easy and Spontaneous Love.
How to tap into these 5 seconds is probably not what you think you must do. (In reality, what you think, what you absorbed from the world around you about love and life gets in your way.)
Pre 42 teaches you to do well that which hasn’t worked. (Hence the spiral.)
And, the spiral results in crisis – infidelity, divorce, illness, failure, a deeps sense of loss and helplessness, etc.
That’s probably why you are reading this; you are facing the crisis, and want a silver of hope and direction.
Sign up for the Love Stacking Matrix – your fastest and most reliable path to those 5 seconds.
Please Join Me While My Schedule Permits
- 4 Half hour zoom training sessions with Dr. Huizenga
- Access to “Office Hours” for questions or comments
- FULL access to the Infidelity Recovery Center
- FULL access to the (Re)Building Courses
- Daily emails to keep you focused and on target
- Daily emails introducing you to the Love Laws
Yes, I want to take advantage of your invitation for a one time payment of $1287 or three monthly payments of $469
I sincerely hope to work with you,
Bob
